a matter of the heart


this is a subject God has been laying on my heart for quite a while now. i doubted i could do it and i made a million excuses as to why i couldn't. honestly, i've been putting it off. it's a risky subject to talk about. as i keep putting it off, God keeps nudging me and has met me at my doubts.

lately i've noticed a growing trend among my facebook friends. it seems to be non-biased, equally showing up by men and women. this newest craze is pictures being posted, normally of partially naked men or women, accompanied by a short little quip such as "yum" or "this sure brightened my day". why do i have an issue with this? well, these people are all married.

you can say it's none of my business, you can say if i don't like it then don't look at their facebook or if it bothers me that much then unfriend then. and i suppose if i wanted to take the "easy way out" then i could do that.  i'm just simply here to say i'm not judging you, i'm loving you enough to point out where you've missed the mark.

i'm sure you're thinking "who does she think she is" and there was a day i would have thought the same thing.  honestly, i don't see myself as better than anyone.  i see myself as a girl who was once broken herself until she allowed the Lord to lead her life.  i am far from perfect and will always need to be tuned into how i am treating my husband.  but thankfully there has been growth and it's not the norm for me to dishonor him.  i have high hopes of saving someone from the turmoil, trials and hurt we've went through in our marriage.    

with that said, let me continue.

i find this posting of pictures completely disrespectful and hurtful to your spouse.  you need to ask yourself what you would feel like if the role was reversed.   if it was your spouse posting those pictures and saying those words, what would YOU feel like?  would it hurt your feelings and make you feel the slightest bit inferior?  would it break your self-esteem and make you question your worth in the marriage?

You have heard it said, Do not commit adultery. But I tell you that anyone who looks at a woman lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart.  Matthew 5:27-28

Jesus thought that looking at another man (or woman) with a flirtatious eye was a serious offense.  every affair begins with a toying glance or innocent flirtatious bantering.  every sin begins with a thought and every spiritual battle is won or lost at the threshold of the mind.  do i think your going to run off and have an affair with luke bryan since you posted a picture of him without a shirt on?  no, that seems a little far fetched.  but i do think you are longing for something that you don't feel you are getting in your marriage.  i also think you better figure it out right quickly before you find yourself putting on lip gloss to go to the post office where that cute blond with steel blue eyes always greets you like you've made his entire day.

let's face it, women long to feel beautiful.  after being married for a few years and having a baby or two, we begin to wonder if we are still pretty or if we are still appealing.  right when we are feeling our lowest, a man comes along and pays us a compliment our hearts skip a beat.  that is natural.  but that compliment should never lead to us returning for more or it turning into a crush.  when that happens, run in the opposite direction and don't reply.  no wonder the divorce rate in this country is 50% and rising!

not only do i trust my husband but i want him to know he can trust me as well.  knowing that you can trust each other is so comforting.  i want to show God and my husband the honor and respect they deserve.  if i would post pictures of other men on my facebook that certainly wouldn't be respectful to either my husband or God.  God has commanded us to submit to our husbands and for our husbands to love us.  when you both come together under Christ and make it a marriage of three (Christ, your spouse and yourself) then your marriage will be complete.

Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspiring of life.  Proverbs 4:23

out for now
~kisses