cherishing your vows {serving}

remember the vows you were almost too nervous to repeat, "to love, honor, and long as we both shall live"?  these aren't just pretty-sounding words.  God takes them very seriously, and He expects husbands and wives to do the same.  these are strong words, filled with meaning.  if every couple kept these definitions in mind, and actively used them in our relationships, we would all be much happier.  even if we already have happy marriages, there is always room for improvement.

i strongly believe that the key to a happy marriage is to learn how to serve each other, to love each other with a true servants heart.  it's hard because we are programmed not to serve.  the world says that marriage should be half and half, equal and filled with give and take.  the world convinces us that not only do we need that but we deserve it.  and anything less deserves a ticket straight out of the marriage.  we are living in a selfish generation where people look for excuses to run and quit.  

Haven’t you read,” he replied, “that at the beginning the Creator ‘made them male and female,’ and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife, and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.
Matthew 19:4-6

what is serving love?  you have a willingness and desire to serve and be totally committed to meeting their needs.  you absolutely want to honor them and put their needs before your own.  you have to purposely take a lower place to honor another (remember this post on humility...see a connection here?).  it flows from strength, not weakness.  it allows you to live out your vows to each other.

marriage is not 50/50.  so many married people have the outlook that they will only do their part if their spouse does theirs.  if that is the outlook you have on your marriage, chances are it is suffering somewhere.  put in your full 100% and expect nothing in return.   don't measure the percentage you are willing to give to meet your spouses needs.  you have to care enough to give your all while expecting nothing in return.  once you establish that, serving love becomes so much easier.  give selflessly to meet your spouses needs and you will both feel loved, honored and respected.

Greater love has no one than this: to lay down one’s life for one’s friends.
John 15:13

you have to commit 100% to serving God and serving each other.  when you serve your spouse it not only shows them respect but it also shows respect to God.  you are honoring marriage as He intended it.  

Love must be sincere. Hate what is evil; cling to what is good. Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.
Romans 12:9-10

this weeks challenge:  practice serving love...make alone time a priority, honor your spouses favorite things, say please + thank you, allow them to just be themselves, praise them to others and compliment them in front of others.  and enjoy the love, honor and respect you get in return!!!

out for now

ps...don't forget to stop back next saturday for our last session, celebrating love...