hope for the hopeless marriage

a dear, sweet friend of mine is going through a bit of a rough time right now in her marriage.  we've all been there at one time or another, haven't we?  i wrote the post below a while back and thought maybe she (and others) would benefit from it.  so here’s the repost…

this morning i woke up with a song in my heart and my head. it's one from my childhood and one that i just super love. i love when God puts a song in my heart before i even wake up. i always pay special attention to those ones. this mornings song was He's able. i know, it's a great one, right? as i was doing my morning devotion, i just kept singing and humming this song. as i was really focusing on the words, today's blog post quickly became apparent.

He’s able, He’s able, I know He’s able;
I know my Lord is able to carry me through.
He healed the broken-hearted
and set the captive free;
He made the lame to walk again
and caused the blind to see.

there was a day not too many years ago when i would have told you my marriage was hopeless. joe had left and we were separated for a few months. suddenly i felt so alone, with two kids to tend to daily, a house to take care of and working full time, i was stressed beyond stressed. some days i felt so low, not even quite sure how i was functioning.

at first, i spent time being angry. and i sure felt justified in that anger. i wanted God to heal my marriage now. i prayed every day, spent time reading my Bible and felt i was entitled to a miracle that didn't seem to be coming my way. anger, hopelessness and fantasies of divorce consumed my days. i was angry. so angry.

there was one certain night when i was really down, almost at my breaking point. i went up on a hill in the middle of the woods, the sky was covered with stars and i could see for miles around. i popped in a cd of hymns, sang along, cried my eyes out and talked to God for hours on end. when i left the hill that night i had something new, HOPE! hope in the Lord restoring my marriage in HIS time.

hope is so important, and realizing that was a pivotal turning point in my life and essentially my marriage. hope motivates us to make positive choices in life and marriage and to get our relationship with Christ right. the Lord knew i had a few "life lessons" to learn along the way, like patience and perseverance. having hope gave me the desire to search MY heart and have Him reveal the parts of my heart that broke His heart.

He can see into the deepest depths of your heart and He knows exactly what it will take to restore Hope into your heart, into your life and into your marriage. He doesn't wait for us to "clean up our act". He meets us where we are and loves us just as we are, sinners. He showers us with his amazing grace. we have a God who knows how we feel, and really cares. He knows our doubts and hopelessness. He can help when we're willing to bring those things to him. nothing is impossible for God!

your past might have shaped you but it doesn't have to define you and hold you captive. don't allow who you were to keep your marriage from being what it is meant to be.

We have this hope as an anchor for the soul, firm and secure
Hebrews 6:19
out for now